When the lockdown was first announced, my anxiety, already quite bad, shot through the roof. I had built a much better space for myself mentally whilst away for my birthday, only for it all to come crashing down soon after we got home as the news reached horrifying heights. I honestly didn't know how I'd be able to cope with the prospect of a lockdown. In brief, a lot of the time I work from home alone whilst my boyfriend does both early and late shifts, and often our precious two days off are the silver lining I look forward to. My boyfriend is a key worker so is still going to work as normal. Both loneliness and low moods can culminate in my anxiety and depression worsening. Despite being all too familiar with solitude, and it being something I prefer over a social work enivornment, I was still concerned about how I would cope.
Soon after the first week of lockdown, I was taken aback by how much my general mood seemed to be improving, and that actually, I seemed to be coping a lot better than most people I was talking to. This seemed both strange and bizarre, and I couldn't understand it. When I set eyes upon this really insightful article that I related to on many levels, I felt relief that I wasn't the only one with mental health struggles who seemed to be doing surprisingly OK. With a vow made to myself to tackle more honest topics on the blog again, I've decided to focus on 5 things that I've found to be of great help to my mental health and general wellbeing during the lockdown and this unsettling, unknown time.
5 unexpected things helping my mental health during the lockdown
Focusing on what I CAN do, not what I CAN'T
I'm personally finding it neither productive nor helpful hearing everyone talk about what they're missing out on and can't wait to do once the lockdown is over. Even though it's understandable, personally it only gets me frustrated and resentful and I don't want to be simmering with resentment, so instead I'm choosing NOT to imagine all the wonderful things I could be doing, and instead putting all my energy into what I can do during the current moment. Luckily I have a major new chapter and career focus in my life that I've just started, so have been pouring my heart and soul into that. It's been a massive game-changer in taking my mind off things. I've heard of people making lists of places they want to visit/travel/explore when this is all over, writing down anything they want to do, placing them in a jar and keep that jar for when the future looks brighter. Even though right now those things won't help me, everyone's different and it's all about doing things that will help you day by day, block by block.
Switching off from the toxicity on social media
Speaking to a friend recently, we discussed how much hypocrisy and martyrdom there is online at the moment. We both agreed it has had a detrimental effect on our mental health, making us feel guilty and ashamed for merely going shopping for essential food items and for daily exercise (which we are currently allowed to do in the UK, so long as you observe Government guidelines and social distance.) I'm 100% for people making valid points, spreading awareness and standing up for what they believe in, especially when it comes to calling out shameless individuals flouting rules and making the lockdown shadow even further over the summer, but what pisses me off is the amount of triggering tweets people seem to throw out without a second thought for someone else's mental health. The lack of thought to those already fighting battles with their mental health astounds me, especially when I see the amount of individuals retweeting purely for shock value and scare-mongering purposes. I'd really urge anyone to consider and think twice before sharing such content right now. Unfortunately I seem to be following a few people that have retweeted content that has affected me quite badly, and it's definitely made me question just why I happen to be following them in the first place. The toxicity on social media has reached violent heights in my eyes, every time I go on twitter I instantly feel sick. Now I limit my time and try to avoid the news, having a look only to keep informed as and when. Logging off, switching off and unfollowing, muting, whatever - make sure life online isn't ruining yours.
Making mental mind blocks
Like everyone else, I have so many places that mean so much to me that I can't frequent right now. But as mentioned above, it isn't helping me to think of any of them. I don't know quite how, but I've managed to mentally block a lot of them out of my mind. Those places no longer exist for me, until further notice. I limit myself to the odd fleeting thought of something I enjoy, and will enjoy in the future, and that's enough. I prefer to focus on what I can do, day by day. It's baffling to me how I've managed to keep such control and mentally file the places I love away into some faraway filing cabinet, but it's helping me so much in the here and now. I try not to look through photos on my phone of all the places I've been to that are all off limits, but when I do I try not to get nostalgic and just (for example if I'm editing a picture for Instagram) keep matter of fact about things and not think too deeply about it all. My boyfriend and I are great creatures of habit and visit a few places weekly, and have done ever since we first dated. But right now routine has been broken, and will stay broken until things get back to normal. Like I said, I'm choosing to focus on taking things one day at a time.
When the lockdown was first announced I wanted answers - how long will it stay like this? When will things get back to normal? How many weeks or months will lockdown remain in place for? I wasted time scrolling through people's opinions online. Funnily enough, everyone was an expert in predicting when lockdown would be over. Realistically nobody has answers and any crystal ball currently looks cloudy. None of us know. So I've stopped putting time constraints on the current situation and am just going to wait and see what happens. False hope is a faithless potion to the remedy we all want to magic before our eyes. Answers are unavailable right now, so I'm intending to take it day by day until there's a brighter outcome.
Being selective in who I give my time & energy to
One key thing I've realised during lockdown is to make note of who is draining my energy and who is replenishing it. A few messages I've received have really got me down when otherwise I've been feeling as bright as is possible to feel in the moment. Naturally we're all going to be talking about what's going on - how can we not? - but taking my wellbeing into account I don't want to speak to someone who is constantly reminding me of all the worry and fear I'm already trying so hard to keep under control. Likewise when people are putting content up online that's positive I find it sad when others can't seem to resist mentioning what's going on - especially when the post has literally nothing to do with all the upset. Let's allow those that want to create a positive and safe space online away from all this horror to do so. We all need a distraction right now, and I'm personally enjoying seeing colourful photos of spring blooms and pretty dresses. Same goes for all the rainbows drawn on roads and encouraging teddy bears in windows. We all need some joy to run with right now.
Realising I can't control the situation
I can't control the uncontrollable, simple as that. Before the lockdown, whenever we had a day out planned I'd always freak out at the possibility of something derailing it. I like to know we can definitely do something, what time we're leaving, etc. etc. Any change of plan left me bitterly disappointed and panicked. But since this has happened I've realised there's something peaceful about not having to make structured plans. My boyfriend and I have just enjoyed a week off together, originally we'd planned a fun-filled time with lots of busy days out. Obviously this didn't happen but we were both surprised by the really enjoyable week we both had regardless. We read a lot, took peaceful walks, watched some amazing Spike Lee movies (my favourite director and one of my heroes), some amazing Harrison Ford movies (Graham's favourite actor and one of his heroes), ate some lovely food and enjoyed a pizza delivery. We clinked wine and beer bottles and had cake to celebrate Graham's birthday on Saturday. The week whizzed past because we made the best of it, and I'm so glad we did. If the lockdown has taught me anything it's that sometimes you just have to get on with things and make the best of what you've got.
There are lots of other little things helping my mental health during the lockdown right now, but these are the key points I wanted to make. Please remember to take care of your mental health and do what's right for you during this difficult time, while of course adhering to the guidelines too to keep everyone safe! I know everyone's situation is different and that we all have our struggles and worries right now. Sending everyone reading this lots of love and light! ♥︎
Speaking to a friend recently, we discussed how much hypocrisy and martyrdom there is online at the moment. We both agreed it has had a detrimental effect on our mental health, making us feel guilty and ashamed for merely going shopping for essential food items and for daily exercise (which we are currently allowed to do in the UK, so long as you observe Government guidelines and social distance.) I'm 100% for people making valid points, spreading awareness and standing up for what they believe in, especially when it comes to calling out shameless individuals flouting rules and making the lockdown shadow even further over the summer, but what pisses me off is the amount of triggering tweets people seem to throw out without a second thought for someone else's mental health. The lack of thought to those already fighting battles with their mental health astounds me, especially when I see the amount of individuals retweeting purely for shock value and scare-mongering purposes. I'd really urge anyone to consider and think twice before sharing such content right now. Unfortunately I seem to be following a few people that have retweeted content that has affected me quite badly, and it's definitely made me question just why I happen to be following them in the first place. The toxicity on social media has reached violent heights in my eyes, every time I go on twitter I instantly feel sick. Now I limit my time and try to avoid the news, having a look only to keep informed as and when. Logging off, switching off and unfollowing, muting, whatever - make sure life online isn't ruining yours.
Making mental mind blocks
Like everyone else, I have so many places that mean so much to me that I can't frequent right now. But as mentioned above, it isn't helping me to think of any of them. I don't know quite how, but I've managed to mentally block a lot of them out of my mind. Those places no longer exist for me, until further notice. I limit myself to the odd fleeting thought of something I enjoy, and will enjoy in the future, and that's enough. I prefer to focus on what I can do, day by day. It's baffling to me how I've managed to keep such control and mentally file the places I love away into some faraway filing cabinet, but it's helping me so much in the here and now. I try not to look through photos on my phone of all the places I've been to that are all off limits, but when I do I try not to get nostalgic and just (for example if I'm editing a picture for Instagram) keep matter of fact about things and not think too deeply about it all. My boyfriend and I are great creatures of habit and visit a few places weekly, and have done ever since we first dated. But right now routine has been broken, and will stay broken until things get back to normal. Like I said, I'm choosing to focus on taking things one day at a time.
When the lockdown was first announced I wanted answers - how long will it stay like this? When will things get back to normal? How many weeks or months will lockdown remain in place for? I wasted time scrolling through people's opinions online. Funnily enough, everyone was an expert in predicting when lockdown would be over. Realistically nobody has answers and any crystal ball currently looks cloudy. None of us know. So I've stopped putting time constraints on the current situation and am just going to wait and see what happens. False hope is a faithless potion to the remedy we all want to magic before our eyes. Answers are unavailable right now, so I'm intending to take it day by day until there's a brighter outcome.
Being selective in who I give my time & energy to
One key thing I've realised during lockdown is to make note of who is draining my energy and who is replenishing it. A few messages I've received have really got me down when otherwise I've been feeling as bright as is possible to feel in the moment. Naturally we're all going to be talking about what's going on - how can we not? - but taking my wellbeing into account I don't want to speak to someone who is constantly reminding me of all the worry and fear I'm already trying so hard to keep under control. Likewise when people are putting content up online that's positive I find it sad when others can't seem to resist mentioning what's going on - especially when the post has literally nothing to do with all the upset. Let's allow those that want to create a positive and safe space online away from all this horror to do so. We all need a distraction right now, and I'm personally enjoying seeing colourful photos of spring blooms and pretty dresses. Same goes for all the rainbows drawn on roads and encouraging teddy bears in windows. We all need some joy to run with right now.
Realising I can't control the situation
I can't control the uncontrollable, simple as that. Before the lockdown, whenever we had a day out planned I'd always freak out at the possibility of something derailing it. I like to know we can definitely do something, what time we're leaving, etc. etc. Any change of plan left me bitterly disappointed and panicked. But since this has happened I've realised there's something peaceful about not having to make structured plans. My boyfriend and I have just enjoyed a week off together, originally we'd planned a fun-filled time with lots of busy days out. Obviously this didn't happen but we were both surprised by the really enjoyable week we both had regardless. We read a lot, took peaceful walks, watched some amazing Spike Lee movies (my favourite director and one of my heroes), some amazing Harrison Ford movies (Graham's favourite actor and one of his heroes), ate some lovely food and enjoyed a pizza delivery. We clinked wine and beer bottles and had cake to celebrate Graham's birthday on Saturday. The week whizzed past because we made the best of it, and I'm so glad we did. If the lockdown has taught me anything it's that sometimes you just have to get on with things and make the best of what you've got.
There are lots of other little things helping my mental health during the lockdown right now, but these are the key points I wanted to make. Please remember to take care of your mental health and do what's right for you during this difficult time, while of course adhering to the guidelines too to keep everyone safe! I know everyone's situation is different and that we all have our struggles and worries right now. Sending everyone reading this lots of love and light! ♥︎
What's helping you stay positive during the lockdown?
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